Are you ready for Mother’s Day?

It’s officially last minute, Mother’s day is just 2 days away, do you have yo mama’s gift yet?

LOL, seriously, did you already get your mother’s gift? Are you going to wait until the last minute and end up buying her something cheap or just taking her out to eat?

I know it’s hard to please a woman, specially when that woman is the one who used to beat the living shnitz out of you when you were a child, so forget the “It’s the thought that counts” BS, the thought doesn’t count for cheap lamos D:<.

Alright, let’s go!

Flowers – Balloons – Chocolates – Baskets

Everything can be ordered online nowadays, so whether your mom lives far away or at walking distance you can save you a lot of trouble by ordering a floral arrangement from places like FloraQueen (delivers worldwide) or 1-800-sendFlowers, they deliver right to your door and you don’t have to go through the hassle of picking up whatever is left from the supermarket.

My mom loves flowers (you should see our garden), so I think it’s a good solution, and it saves you the trouble of the flowers dying from the heat inside your car (the humidity in this place is ridiculous).

Now, if your mom/wife/lady is a sucker for sweets (like most women are even if they try to deny it), you could try places like Astor Chocolate,  ProFlowers (they also sell flowers, but you have to see their assortment of gift baskets and sweets), or even gourmet cookie baskets.

Or you could always buy flowers from the guys who make a living out of selling flowers on every corner of every major street, hey, $5 to $10 bucks beats the supermarket prices every day of the week and twice on Sunday.

Perfumes and other cosmetics

This is a tricky one, it works best if the one receiving the gift is your spouse, but it also works on moms, you just have to make sure you buy what they like and not what somebody tells you they will like.

Fortunately there are tons of perfume retailers online, like ThePerfumeSpot (delivers worldwide), Luxury Perfume, and even discount places like AcePerfume.

Of course if you just don’t know what fragrance they like, you could always go gift sets, they usually come with a shower gel and some other stuff they might find useful.

Clothing, shoes and accessories

If there’s one thing that creeps me out is buying clothes for women. For one it’s really hard to guess a size, most likely you will fail. And two, it’s weird when a guy spends too much time in the women’s section.

If you really have to you might as well order online and then pickup from department stores like Sears, Kmart, and Target, or take her directly.

If you want to risk it all, take her to buy a pair of shoes (yes, I said the forbidden word), places like The Walking Company sell great, comfortable shoes, I usually buy my shoes from there (I have special feet, as in f*ck*d up).

Or let’s say she had some kind of eye surgery, or lasic, she should be wearing sunglasses, as in the good ones (don’t buy the cheap ones, they’re worthless). A few weeks ago a bought a pair of polarized sunglasses for my mom at a local Sunglass Hut, believe me when I say she will thank you for it.

Electronics

There are many online retailers out there, so all I can say is go for the ones you know, like newegg and Amazon.

Electronic picture frames are popular nowadays, just keep in mind that if you buy something today it won’t make it until next week, but as long as whatever you buy there gets to its destination before the end of May it might work, just make sure it’s worth it.

If you’re gonna take her to eat…

If that’s all you could come up with, please, at least take her to a nice place, as much as I like IHOP, Denny’s, and similar restaurants they are still on the cheap end, have some decency and take her to a better place, remember that this is the same woman who had to put up with you (or your children) for 9 months and then years while you (they) did nothing but eat and crap.

The last line of defense

If you just don’t know, are too cheap, or plain weird you could try some of this solutions.

You could send your mom an e-card, a personalized online poem, or buy her something weird like tattoo stalkings, a talking pig speakerphone toy (that’s not weird at all), or my personal favorite, the I love you toast stamper.